5 Things Your Husband Wants to Tell You

Although we can not accept the idea that men are from Mars and Women are from Venus, when it comes to communication, men and women express themselves in different ways. "For women, the goal of communication is most often refer to men, it is usually to share information," says Karen Gail Lewis, EdD, relationship therapist and author of Why do not you understand? So while it may seem to you that he ignores your feelings, you may want like crazy, I just want to say what you want. Read on to learn seven things your husband meant to help close the gap of communication.

1. A small "thank you" makes a big difference.

You might think: "I do a lot here, because I have to say" thank you "when in plots?" But you probably do not agree: "I cook, clean, wash dishes and clothes a lot happier if my wife said," thank you "more often," said James .* Just like you, need to respect and, yes , a little 'ego-stroking. "Research shows that happy couples often compliments. Provides a simple" thank you "is a simple way to show appreciation and make him feel important," says Todd Creager, a licensed marriage therapist and author of The Long, Hot Marriage.

2. Are likely to offer practical advice as a shoulder to cry on.

When you come home from work and starts to complain about your husband in a demanding boss, he sounds like asking for help, even if all you want is a listening. * Dave encounters this often: ". One day my wife was the expression of the problem Every time I came up with a solution or a suggestion, he stopped, and refuse to think that I will tell you what to do, or gives the impression that he can not think of solutions on their own .. " I do not know that when you give advice on the treatment of a bad boss or a domineering sister-in-law, "So he shows that it cares," says Dr. Lewis. Try not to confuse criticism of his advice, but do not be shy to tell him, 'You know, I tried that too. I think what I really need now is just cancel! "

3 If you want a third work of a day, then tell me.

He asked four times to fix the closet door wobbly without success, so your complaint about not seem justified. "My wife does all the time. I know I have things on my mental list of do what I want to manipulate, and I will! But if I say it's urgent, I'll get there as soon as possible," said Don. * When you intend to apply for a job or task to do, hear everything is what you do not that you want to do based on a schedule you set, but not share with him, said Dr. Lewis . "He wants you knew it would be very happy to establish what you want fixed, provided it is clear." It would be great if you set the cabinet door at the time my parents arrived on Sunday "

4. Tell me directly what bothers.

When man lived in caves, humans have probably sat around confused by the fluctuating moods of their friends, wondering why it will not just say "I am angry against you because ..." instead "I'm fine" through gritted teeth. The thing is, he knows something is wrong, with a sigh exaggerated and stomping around. "You may think you do not communicate, but you are. What you feel is transferred, "said Creag, but not in a healthy way. The key is to express it directly - "I'm sorry you came home and went directly to the computer" - instead of being passive-aggressive.

5. Do not ask me how you look at the dress.

First, there is no right answer to a question like "Do these pants make me look fat?" Then there are times when you ask her opinion even if you've made your choice: "My wife seems to be asking things like "Should I buy this dress?" To confirm his choice not to have my mind right. And if she asks me how she looks in a dress, I know enough to say "I love it! "Regardless of what I really think," says Alex .* So either do not ask for anything, or more precisely, Dr. Lewis advises. "Ask them:" Do you think these shoes match this dress? "And certainly think before asking you things like" Does my ass look big in this skirt? "If you want a carpet," you look good to me all the time, honey! "Then you're fine as long your husband is willing to play along. But if it's the honesty you're after, be careful what you wish.